MUSI

OMG, OMG, OMG, OMG, OMG......................OMG. Sounding like a tween girl who's just discovered a ghost fan-site for naked pictures of Robert Pattinson is TOTALLY unintentional. I just can't help myself - Oh My God. "SEAFOOD NIGHT" at MUSI, two Fridays ago, still not fully recovered. That's how bad it was and I didn't even get sick.

Other than the great company I kept that night, everything else was borderline psychotic Japanese slasher-horror-armageddon-somethingelse movie-like. Well that's not true, that one Oyster did taste alright. One oyster out of 15, plus shrimp, plus scallops, plus sardines, plus mussels, plus clams, plus KULDKOGER( I will get back to this one in a minute). Not exactly a respectable batting average there. So we had everything and a lot of wine and here comes the thumbs-up for MUSI, wine was not priced greedily. See - I can give an objective evaluation to any kind of eating establishment.

Bad service, over-cooked shrimp, oysters that died of natural causes ( some of them confused and searching for elephant graveyards), scallops sliced and diced to make them look like there's a lot and...... over-cooked, bad mussels, bad clams, bad everything. None of it bad in a fresh way.

Bad service meaning this time that we had to ask for cutlery then napkins then wine then a wine cooler then ice for the wine cooler and so on. I do get it that they are trying to be niche in a "we don't even try to be a real restaurant" type of way, but for some reason they think that I still need to be a real customer with real money. I really should have brought "Monopoly" money with me. It's perfect for occasions like this.

Now, I saved the best for last. KULDKOGER, KULDKOGER. Man, there's nothing like terribly undercooked white fish in the culinary world. It is the equivalent of getting plague in the 21st century. There's no need for it, nobody does it and it almost never happens. That's not it and this was the first for me. My friend announced in an apologizing manner that eating this dish the way it is, is just unthinkable and sent it back to the kitchen. By the way, that was the very first time, ever.

The same half-eaten fish was put back in a oven, then back on the same plate and then was brought back to the table.
THE END.

In Studio Vinum New Menu

New menu is always exciting. For many so are the so called SilverSpoons and In Studio Vinum got couple of them this time around. Anyway...I've always liked the place. Not really the place, mainly the food and wine and Imre for making truthful and unpretentious recommendations.

So I went. Had pâté with a salad. It was delicious, salad fresh and the pâté rich. Tasted duck fat and maybe some bacon. Then followed with a classic Coq au vin and this was real good. Maybe I personally prefer the sauce little fruitier. I'm not even sure if that's the right description for the sensation that the taste buds take to the cortex, but hey that's the best I got. The accompanying risotto could've also been little cheesier, but don't get me wrong everything was real good plus the new prices seem to go little better with the times.

Recommended wine was good as usual and I love that you can ask for a recommended pairing without having to ask for the price. They are not out there to take advantage of you, so step in and let Imre and Allar take care of you.

Hai Long

Pleasant surprises are hard to come by in these times. Hai Long is one of them. For reasons unknown to me I kept passing them by for couple of years, with no attempt whatsoever to walk in their door. Just couple of weeks ago I took a chance and I'm glad. I've been back three times since.

Sure, if you're planning a romantic dinner or a celebratory dinner or a dinner function that requires any kind of pleasant atmosphere, this is not the place. The food on a other hand is real nice, well prepared and you can actually taste the freshness. Hai Long is not a Korean reaturant, nor is it Chinese. Not sure where to place them, since they even have some Thai and possibly Indian influenced dishes on the menu.

I have tasted at least 10 different dishes and of course some are better than others, but all of them are good. If I would have to pick on anything then it would have to be the desserts. Even that is not their fault. It's me. Whenever I think of a dessert, my mind skips the whole continent of Asia. Then again I absolutely have to praise the chefs of Hai Long for not being afraid to make dishes little spicy. We all need spice, some of us just don't know it.

I have to bring up MSG. I have couple of friends who are seriously allergic to it. Since I personally don't have a strong reaction to it I can't say that it's not used in their kitchen. I've had some food seriously laced with MSG in a past and remember that it did not sit well with me either, so there's a chance it's pretty safe at Hai Long. Hey, take little bites.

Now I'm going to bring up a different question. They're real proud of the fact that the guys working in the kitchen are of real Korean ethnicity. Why is it that so many people think that as long as you're of right ethnicity, you'll be able to cook better food originating your home country? I have had the best pizza in a world made by Puerto Ricans, best Ratatouille prepared by Ecuadorians and the most mouth-watering croissants by Albanians. Same time I have a feeling that there's gotta be at least a billion Chinese who are not all excellent chefs. I think it's time to get over this silliness and for everybodys sake just hope for a good, talented and hard-working chef, no matter his or hers background.

Korsaar

Restaurant Korsaar is without a question the silliest and most ridiculous restaurant in the city of Tallinn, and oh yeah also the most out of place. They spent a s...t load of money trying to make the place to fit in for the next "Pirates of the Caribbean" quadro-sequel for any of the worlds Disney theme parks. I just can't figure it out why did they place it here. Enough of that.

Let's start with the entrance - actually the lack of it, to get there you need to enter the Bavarian style Beer House. Now if you pass the ship-wreck sticking out of the wall, you've gone too far. Also if you've reached the coat-check, you've gone too far. See, somewhere between the entrance to the beer hall and the coat-check is, and here I go again, a ship-wreck sticking out of the wall and you'll notice two pirates hanging out underneath it. One of them an effing midget, yes yes a midget. If you're lucky or unlucky depending on your preferences you'll get a real piraty GRRR from the bigger one. That signifies the point of no return. Get ready for the ride and hold onto your wallet.

It's hard to describe what you'll see after you walk down the stairs, but I'll give it a try. Pools, fish-tanks, possibly a fountain and loads of marine periphenilia. The walls are all made to look like an inside of a cave, unfortunately a cave made out of packing material. All of the staff is dressed as pirates, even the line chefs in the kitchen. I did not see the head chef. Good guess would be that he's wearing the captains outfit. Ahhh, almost forgot about the giant plasma screen on wall that's showing a stormy ocean scenery. Well, that is most definitely not all of it, but I give up and move onto to the most important part - the food.

The food is not good. I ordered "Octopus carpaccio with creole tomato salsa" for a starter and I have to admit that it was possibly the most interesting and wonderful presentation of any kind of food I've ever seen. It's just that it did not taste like anything. I'm not even talking about octopus, no - it did not taste like anything. Maybe they had some of that packing material they used to make the cave walls with left over and decided to use the extras to sculpt some octopi. Plus there was nothing creole about the salsa, I'm not even sure that there was much salsa about the salsa. I'm telling you, it was the most beautiful looking worst dish anywhere ever.

This pretty fiasco was followed by a "Korsaar bouillabaise" and that is so much more than just a bouillabaisse (notice how I did not misspell the word and also do not charge 215EEK's for a simple bowl of soup). Then again this is what you get for your money. An effing midget rolls in a cart all the way to the table for the line chef to prepare the soup right in front of you in a pirates costume. I know I'm being politically incorrect calling him an effing midget, but c'mon I didn't hire an effing midget to work as a miniature pirate and that is truly politically incorrect. Now after the midget rolls in the soup cart, he walks up to a stormy sea on the plasma and starts turning the ships wheel all while tilting himself in sync with the waves on the screen. Sure, I was laughing before. In fact I started laughing up-stairs before entering, but at this point I was laughing out loud hysterically resembling a horse gone mad.

Anyway you get the picture. Loved the waitress, loved laughing out loud, even loved a little bit the effing midget. Hated the food, hated even more the prices and I'm willing to bet my right leg that I'm never going back. Now if I lose the bet, I could possibly get a job there with my brand new wooden leg and everything.


NB! Pretty sure that this is the most expensive place in town.

Sushicat

Heard some buzz on Facebook, was bored and decided to try it out. Before I went, I quickly checked out the web site and I have to give to them, Sushicat has one of the coolest looking restaurant sites in town. Couldn't really figure out why the menu opens as a pdf, but other than that it seems like they know what they're trying to accomplish.

I'm afraid that's where the good stops. Bad sushi, bad service, bad drink selection, bad everything. I did like the enthusiasm of the owner, unfortunately it did not carry over to the waiting staff. I do get the whole manga is cool and so on and I couldn't care less that the place is done cheaply. I get it, cheap place with sushi for hard times, but still...even in bad times you don't want to admit that you have to eat bad.

So here, I went for this:


But ended up with this:

Lydia

Restaurant Lydia is a sad, sad, sad, sad place. I was there with a friend for business lunch and the place was all dressed up in sea-foam colored table linens, curtains and chair-covers. The question remained who and what for? Two of us were the very only customers and the two awkwardly friendly and polite waiters gave me an impression of captains willing to go down with their ships.

I ordered off the business lunch menu with the addition of a salad and when the food came, it was not bad. The salad was fresh, the risotto was alright and the soup came in a freshly baked bread bowl. Considering once again that we were the only customers, that's just sad.

I don't know what else to say. It's not bad, but I will never return and I can't even imagine who goes there or who's ever been there for that matter. Like I said...

SAD

Kloostri Ait

The concept of comfort food is some what foreign to Estonians, well at least the concept of serving comfort food in a restaurant is foreign.

Wikipedia gives the following definition - Comfort food is typically inexpensive, uncomplicated, and easy to prepare. Many people turn to comfort food for familiarity, emotional security, or as a special reward. The reasons a dish becomes a comfort food are diverse but often include pleasant associations of childhood. Small children often seem to latch on to a specific food or drink (in a way similar to a security blanket) and will repeatedly request it in high stress situations. Adults eat comfort food for a sense of continuity.

Who doesn't need the sense of continuity? Who doesn't require occasional emotional security? Well, Kloostri Ait is the Estonian answer to "gourmet-diners" and "gastro-pubs". Food here is the closest thing to an Estonian version of comfort food. This is food everybody wishes their ma's and grandma's could prepare.

My personal favorites are what they call gratins:"Trout and potato gratin with egg and cheese" for one, plus a "Mozzarella and potato gratin with tomatoes". I would call them cheesy casseroles. But hey, who gives a damn, as long as they taste good.

Now if only they would slash their prices a tiny bit to make us extra comfortable...

Best Food I Ate in 2008.

Bastilla au Poullet - restaurant Agadir - Tangier - Morroco

Tony's Seafood salad - at my Mom's and Tony's house - Chef Tony

Frites - Maison Antoine - Bruxelles - Belgium

Sautéed bacon with mushrooms and home-fries - Cafe Pushkin - Tallinn

Fried Okra - Sonny's Real Pit BBQ - Stuart - Florida

Polenta with spicy sauce - Carmine's - NYC

Filet Mignon au poivre - my house - made by me

Resolutions, resolutions.

I will cook more.

I will eat out less.

I will enjoy wines with good taste, humble pedigree and friendly cost.

I will stop going to overpriced and pretentious restaurants altogether.

I will cook more.

I will have friends over more often.

I will keep making demi-glaze and roux from scratch.

I will eat less.

Bogdan

This is somewhat off the beaten track. Bogdan is located in the heart of Soviet era projects and not that easy to find, but it is definitely worth the effort.

First of all it doesn't break the bank since the most expensive dish on the menu is just 110 EEK's and most wines are less than 400. They do have their very own trophy wine listed, something that sounds really cool "Krõmvein Krasnõi Krõmskii 1958" for 1500EEK's. I have no idea what it is, but hey...that's cool.

Now the interior is nothing special, but it's nice and clean plus the the girls are quite friendly and polite. Yes it is a simple place, but simple can be good and the food here is good. Some of it downright excellent.

Now here's a warning - do not go to Bogdan if you're not a fan of garlic, I think everything on the menu has tons of in it. Then again the cuisine is Ukraine and that's the way it's supposed to be.

Last time I started with Potato Pancakes with Lox and it was delicious, followed with Borscht, and that was good. I remember being torn between the Bcorscht and Okroshka, I'll have that next time. Now even thought I was pretty stuffed I managed to extend my stomach for Stuffed Cabbage that was, how would I put it...ahh - made with Love.

All in all highly recommended, just try to remember - simple is beautiful.

Dominic

This is a place that looks great, has a great location and has a positive word of mouth going for it. So I stopped by for lunch.

Dominic has a really nice vibe about it. Interior is pleasantly unassuming, specially on the cafe side, it just makes you feel comfortable.

I was greeted with a friendly "Hello" as soon as I walked in and altogether the service was great throughout the lunch.

I got a fresh salad to start with and was perfectly happy with it. Everything was truly fresh, it looked nice on the plate and was finished with a pretty well balanced vinaigrette. Oh and they brought fresh baked bread to the table that seemed to be baked in house. One was with sun-dried tomatoes and the other one with walnuts I think. Nice.

Then I got a pasta dish Du Jour and that's when everything went wrong. It was brought to the table and I got suspicious right away. I've never seen pasta sauce that color before, it's hard to describe. Maybe blueish-greenish-grayish would do it justice. It tasted as repulsive as it looked.

I'd like to think that I was just truly unlucky and I will give them another shot. It's just that so many other things about this place I do like. Then again food in restaurant business is king, so it'll be just a shot.

La BOTTEGA

Trattoria Enoteca La Bottega opened this past Wednesday night and considering that places are closing left and right, opening a new restaurant right now could be considered either an act of madness or courageous endurance. So of course I couldn't help myself and I stopped by for lunch.

First of all it looks great. The medieval space has been meticulously renovated, then everything tastefully designed and decorated, theme being that of a trattoria. Don't be fooled though it's a real nice restaurant with some simpler trattoria style dishes on the menu.

It's not cheap, but they consciously set the price limit. Nothing on the menu is over 300 EEK's, some do come close... as close as 290 EEK's close. I think a lot of people will appreciate the fact there are quite a few things that are affordable on the menu. Once again it's not cheap. For example only one pasta dish is less than a 100, most of them are around 150-160.

Now to the food. Chef de Cuisine Nicolo Tanda deffinetly knows his stuff and thank god his not one of these "I'm an ARTISTE" chefs. He's a mechanic, but a truly great one at that. I had Bruscetta, then Gnocchi with Sweet Pepper sauce and then Grilled Sardines. All of it simple, all of it delicious and all of it good looking. No silly looking little sculptures on the plate here.

The staff was friendly, polite, maybe still working things out a little bit, but then again they've been open for two days. Plus they apologized to me in case everything wasn't perfect. Perfect.

Best Italian food in Tallinn right now. Possibly my new favorite place. What it needs now is people, that of course will not be an easy task to accomplish these days. Go now, who knows for long we will have this chance to enjoy high quality culinary offering without any of the bullshit that seems to come with it in Tallinn.

NB! The address is VENE 4.

Fattoria Poggio Gagliardo Wine Dinner at In Vino Veritas

Andrea Surbone picked the wines for the night and his wife ...crap her name is totally escaping me right now, was in the kitchen. You know that I like this place -

In Vino Veritas

- it's homey and unpretentious. So was the whole night. Food that was simple, but mostly tasty, plus some very enjoyable wine accompanying it.

These were the wines up for tasting:

Villa Caiano 2004

Montescudaio Bianco 2007

Montescudaio Rosso 2006

Ultimosole 2003

Rove Chinato 2003

and for dinner the following :

Vitello tonnato

Risotto con ragu al coltello

Capretto al marsala, patate al formo

Bunet

Like I said it was nice. It reminded me of my mothers husbands Anthony Saraceno's cooking, just not as good. Don't get me wrong, that's not putting the nights offering down, because Tony is an excellent chef and nobody in Tallinn no matter where they studied becoming a chef does Italian the way he does. Maybe you need to grow up eating Pasta e Fagioli and Ossobuco. I don't know.

Surprise of the night was the finish: Bunet and Rove Chinato, yes maybe I've had better Bunet, but it was still real good and Rove Chinato - Whoa. They supposedly add somekind of herb concoction to a desert wine that's already pretty funky tasting. The result was stunning. In a very good way.

And I still love this place.

Cooking Pretty - The Worst Offenders in Tallinn.

I'm quoting Anthony Bourdain - possibly the coolest guy who's ever held a Sabatier blade and an absolute definitely in a hypothetical "If you could have five people over for dinner":

"When I hear 'artist', I think of someone who doesn't think it necessary to show up at work on time. More often than not their efforts, convinced as they are of their own genius, are geared more to giving themselves a hard-on than satisfying the great majority of dinner customers. Personally I'd prefer to eat food that tastes good and is honest reflection of its ingredients, than a 3-foot-tall caprice constructed from lemon grass, lawn trimmings, coconuts and red curry. You could lose an eye trying to eat that."

Here they are, where style kicks substances ass on a daily base :

Bocca

Ö

Horisont

Museum

Stenhus Champagne Dinner

Alright, this happened almost two weeks ago on October 30th, but for some reason I did not feel any urgency about declaring my participation to everybody who reads this blog.

Not that it was a horrible, but I have to admit and I do this somewhat proudly that I would call it mediocre. Let's not forget that this is a place that has received more "Silver Spoons" than they know what to do with them. They have been elected to be the best and they are still considered to be the best by many. Not me though...

First of all - it's a HOTEL, second - it's in a BASEMENT, but the biggest problem is in the kitchen - they can not produce high quality in volume. They are not unique in Tallinn when it comes to this. There are plenty of restaurants that can make a good looking tasty plate of food, they just can't do it when the dining room is full.

I'm not gonna bore you with copying the nights menu. It was all filled with phrases like "Chanterelle Duxelle", "Langoustini Tails" and "Black Olive and Vanilla Crust".

Let's just say that the seafood served was not fresh and I will always pick fresh over exotic. The beef had been resting under the warming lights for way way way too long. Well sure, the schedule was running little late, but a good kitchen should be able to adjust and a great one to anticipate. Oh... I did like the "Chanterelle Duxelle" accompanying the beef.

And of course I enjoyed the Champagne, all of it good and probably more than anybody else there. Ahh almost forgot, it was expensive.

Han

I like places that are simple and I like places that serve simple food. So it breaks my heart to write this following. Han, don't you know that first impressions are forever, you don't get a second chance.

The first thing you notice walking in the door is a horrific stench coming from the direction of the mens room, not a good start for a dining adventure. Contrary to my previous statement I did give them a second chance. See, even though it was smelly, the food was good and the service friendly, if not little awkward, the first time around.

But then ...the second time I was proven right, they proved me right. First impressions matter, we should trust our gut feelings and heuristic rules are thousands of years old.

I ended up sitting for 20 minutes with no drinks or the menu for that matter. Only after aggressively going after it myself was I able to wrestle the god damn thing away from the staff.

Then I waited for another 35 minutes before the food arrived and sure some of it was not bad, but by this point it did not matter anymore. Verdict was made - thumbs down, toes down and just about everything down.

Now on top of everything I can't include a link to their web site. Guess what? It's broken. Go figure...Maybe that's what was stinking up their toilet.

Bonaparte

I apologize in advance for being uncharacteristically laconic with this post. Not even sure why, but maybe it's better this way.


Oct.9. fancy-shmancy Game themed tasting menu at Bonaparte to celebrate the beginning of the hunting season. Fix price, fix menu, fix drinks. Everything game with wine pairings.


Beaver bavaroise with baked apples - Louis Tollet ler Cru La Grande Cuvee

Little piece of dark meat possibly manufactured by Michelin in between tiny pieces of white toast that had achieved a new level of staleness under the warming lights. Liked the champagne.


Moose meat consommé with elk liver and mini cheesecake - Châteauneuf-du-Pape Blanc 2006 Domaine des Relagnes

Delicious with absolutely gorgeous white, no refilling the glass though - cheap asses.


Wild Duck Terrine with whortleberry glaze - Saint-Joseph " Le Prieure" 2005 Domaine Jean-Luc Colombo

Horribly dry with mouth smackingly sweet paste all over it that would've been at home with a banana split. Good wine though plus by now the wait staff knew that just one glass is just not gonna do it.


Roe deer Carré with A PORCHINI MUSHROOM and some nightmarish white beans stuffed pastry thingy - Châteauneuf-du-Pape "La Roquette" 2004 Vignobles Brunier

Overcooked, with ... no really one tiny piece of a mushroom. Love that wine, always will.


Pomegranate Granitee

Sugary slush that's more sugar than slush, should be the other way around.



Wild Rowan cake with Chocolate Fondue - "L'Arbre du Voyageur" VSOP Martinique

Poundcake like white substance that was extremely dry, excellent chocolate and WOW to the Rum.


Fresh mint tea

It was just effing tea, I was hoping for a Morrocon style The a la Menthe. No such luck.

Ö

Sure they´ve had their share of "Silver spoons" and a lot of folk consider them to be one of the best, if not the best...BUT, I have been reluctant to offer my opinion about them. See the guy in charge loves foam and yes we all love foam - on the beach, in the bubble bath, it is a must for shaving and whipped cream is foam, no matter if you use it in the dining or the bed room.

Right... but he puts it on the plate and then the plate is placed in front of me. Guess what, that is the absolute worst place for the foam to be...No really. I can´t stand it when something like herring or veal for that matter is turned into a foam form. I don´t get it either. Sure, maybe it´s just me and everybody else loves ribs turned into foam, but... On top of everything this is just so five years ago.

Anyway, I decided to give them one more chance and it turned out to be a somewhat pleasant surprise. At this point I have to acknowledge the intricate skills of my date for the night, who managed to recommend things on the menu knowing my foam´o´phobia.

So here it goes. I had.............Dammit...I can´t remember what I had. I wonder if it means anything? I do remember that Conch Chowder I enjoyed almost ten years ago in Boca Raton, I also can remember the best Gnocchi ever with Artichoke Pesto in Monteriggioni about eight years ago and my very first Porterhouse at Peter Luger´s. Now, I wonder if this really means anything. Probably not...

Here´s their link

Best Baristas of Tallinn

If you can live without coffee, can you still call it living? I personally absolutely love a great espresso. You know you have it just by looking at it, the crema is not brownish-yellowish, but dark red mixed with colors of chestnut and butterscotch. Sometimes almost burgundy shade. When you drink it, you taste the sweetness alongside the bitterness without adding any sugar. I don´t like when it´s accompanied with a sour taste. So you get it. I like my espresso.

Here are the best places to have a cup.

Illy Galleria del Caffè - Lai 26

Kehrwieder Chocolaterie - Saiakäik 1

Cafe Chocolaterie de Pierre - Vene 6

Josephine - Vene 16

Well...and my place - Lai 32

Oh, and every office that uses 7 Kohvipoissi machines and coffee. If you think that this is a shameless plug - you´re absolutely right. They are my friends, but that does not change the fact that their coffee is excellent. Give it a try.

Spaghetteria da Vinci

They've been open now under the new name for a while, but I've been ignoring them in spite of their good location and good looking wait-staff. See, they used to be an ice-cream parlor, well in fact a gelato parlor, if that's even appropriate to say. In any case they used to be the best place in Tallinn to enjoy Italian ice-cream or any kind of ice-cream for that matter.

Then they decided to reform and ended up with what they are now - a Spaghetteria da Vinci... Alright...Good news though - they still have the ices, just not all the same flavors. Don't get me wrong, still great.

I don't know what it is about this place, but I like them. They're not over-designed or over-priced or serving "cooking pretty" food. There you go, maybe that's it. Good, tasty food that doesn't end up costing you an arm and a leg.

You can get a fresh salad or/and a reasonably sized pasta dish and be on your way. Wait, don't forget the gelato. Plus, one of the blondes has this absolutely amazingly intriquing little smile that I just can't read. Either she thinks that I'm the biggest idiot or she's flirting with me.

P.S. Best value offering in Mid-Town: Birra Menabrea 66cl - 40EEk

Museum

Perfect location, really really perfect. Nice, but not over-achieving cuisine, at least on paper and potentially people-friendly space. What I mean is that it's not a basement, not a hotel and it has floor to ceiling windows. So far - so good for the Museum.

Now, I really don't want to bitch about the interior...so let's get it over with quickly. Unless you are one of the people who have trouble making a decision about what kind of lighting fixture or a chair you like or a wall color for that matter, you are not gonna like this interior fiasco. I do get it, they were going for the whole retro 70's chic thing, but it turned out like a cheap set for making a mocumentary about the work of John Holmes.

Oh and the whole we have a lounge and a restaurant side. It really would be fine , but why does the restaurant side look like the lounge and vice versa.

Now to the food. I actually visited them several times, I'll explain shortly. The
first visit I ordered Trout Tartar with Avocado in Miso sauce. The trout was quite nice and fresh and so was the avocado. What ruined the whole thing was the so-called Miso sauce that was just mind boggling. They managed to somehow come up with a dark brown gravy that was so sweet that it made my teeth itch and obviously overwhelmed the taste of mango and the trout. Believe me it would have done that to any taste known to man.

After that I ordered Scallops grilled on Teppanyaki with Wakame and Cucumber Salad. I was surprised with the salad and in a good way. It was tasty and fresh and visually pleasing. The scallop was slightly over-cooked, but not bad. The keyword being A SCALLOP. What makes them believe that if you slice the thing crosswise you can call it scallops. What, you think that putting a knife to it is gonna make it multiply. One scallop is one scallop. That's it.

Then before leaving I took another look at the menu and saw that they have a Burger on there. So I promised to myself to be back. So I did. That happened few days later when they were getting ready to close for the night. I had the burger and several Mojitos. Possibly the best Mojitos in town and also possibly the best burger in town.


Still pretty far from a real burger though.

In Vino Veritas

This is not the first time I'm talking about In Vino Veritas, but I figured that everybody likes good news. And the good news is - they finally got their pizza oven up and running. Still testing it out though, but very shortly will be adding various pizzas to their menu offering.

I like this place and I like their food. Both are unpretentious and inexpensive. Plus the food is tasty. Just the place for my liking. The main guy in the kitchen does not consider himself an artist, but a craftsman. And he or she is a good one at that.

Simple, but delicious, homey tasting pasta dishes and excellent wine. That is enough for me, no need to pile ingredients on the plate in a three dimensional puzzle manner.
They just added Carpaccio and now pizza...I like it even more.

Possibly the best tasting simple Italian fair in Tallinn.

Vapiano

I don't know why McDonald's gets such a bad wrap, since everybody who walks in the door knows exactly what their in for. There are no far reaching promises involved. It is what it is. Maybe that is the way I should look at Vapiano-Pasta-Pizza-Bar. It's hard to do though since these are my very favorite things PIZZA, PASTA and BARS.

Because of that I'm probably not the best person to judge them. I'm just me and they are a pretty decent size international food service chain with over 30 franchises all over the world. No McDonald's though.

I'm not going to go into the whole how anybody who walks in the door doesn't matter thing in this post, if anybody is interested you can check out ranting on that subject matter on the following link http://allweneedisloveandmarketing.blogspot.com/.

Back to food, it's simple and not bad. That is not a compliment. Not bad is not good and considering that good is the opposite of excellent, not bad is pretty bad. They tried to cut cost by eliminating waiting staff and also by hiring people who try hard to impersonate chefs behind the counter visible for every visitor. Not sure why this was necessary. Yes it is always fun to watch a highly skilled people in the kitchen, but if you don't have them, it's not such a great idea.

Let's not forget that little mistakes like dropping one of the shrimp on the prep counter instead of the skillet and then picking it up and adding it to others would be hidden from the eyes of people who ordered scampi e spinaci. I wonder if the five second rule would've also applied with the floor contact?

The whole process of food preparation that is visible to diners reminded me of a inefficient factory floor from a time that I have personally not witnessed and only seen from black and white movie footage. It also made me dream of possible distant future culinary adventures prepped and controlled by super-smart robots. Well...

I have to admit that I did go back with my kids and they gave it a thumbs up. They also like McDonald's.

Bruxelles

Once again I'm trailing off course with the post I'm writing right now. It has nothing to do with eating out in Tallinn. Being away and different locations, specially the ones I've never been to do that to me.

Brussels being small enough for me to develop habit forming favorite spots in just few days is an absolute gem when it comes to street food and people watching. Two activities that I have been missing for a while. Yes, you got it, street food is more than just food - it is an activity.

Frites at Maison Antoine located at Place Jourdan reminded me once again that getting the starch out of the potato and frying it to a golden perfection in a way that leaves the inside fluffy and the outside crunchy is as much art as making a picture perfect chocolate truffle. Don't let me get started on truffles.

Waffles with whipped cream, strawberries and chocolate topping, waffles with whipped cream, bananas, walnuts and chocolate topping and waffles with way more elaborate toppings. Need I say more.

Only thing that will top all that heavenly sweetness...?
You guessed it - beer. Blonde, brune and all the wonderful lambics. This is not your usual get me a lager - I'm thirsty and get me drunk affair. Tasting and smelling all the different palates, some fruity and sweet, some honestly earthy is an experience in itself.

Oh yeah and I discovered a fourth meal of the day while people watching, here's a picture

Rooftops of Tallinn - Lounge 24 & Terrace of Vertigo

This was a fun night. Somebody came up with an idea that we should go somewhere high up and since there were no other suggestions, that's what we did. It turned out to be an excellent idea.

We started with the rooftop of SAS Radisson Hotel. The place is called Lounge 24 and the weather was good, the view even better and the company - good friends = excellent.

I had a salmon wrap and a fresh salad. The wrap was pretty damn good, but seriously on the small side. The salad was indeed fresh and except for the fact that they forgot to toast the pignoli nuts really enjoyable. Pignoli nuts untoasted are just an addition of protein, not taste. Still like I said I liked my dinner.

My friends were split down the middle when it came to a verdict. The salad with roasted duck got a thumbs up, but a Caesar's thumbs down. Well really, it was Iceberg lettuce. Desserts were a big hit. For whatever reason I skipped them, so I truly shouldn't say anything.

Now to the service. The girl waiting on us absolutely hated doing that, hated being there, hated her job and quite possibly hated us. Even that did not ruin the experience.

The night was young and we decided to walk across the street for drinks. Vertigo's terrace is way lower than the top of the neighboring hotel, but the views are still great. We were lounging on the couches enjoying the setting sun. Beautiful.

So we went for the Mojitos and staying with Cuban feel I decided to order a nice cigar. I was pleasantly surprised, after checking their menu, that they had my favorites - Monte Cristo #2's. EXCEPT...they had just had a party who smoked all of them. Hmmm...OK, I'm not saying anything. So I opted for a Cohiba Robusto. It was not well kept, the wrapper was broken in at least three places. But guess what, another Moijto or two and the still setting sun raised my tolerance to an unheard of level.

Beautiful.



P.S. At some point I also had dessert at Vertigo's terrace - NY style raspberry cheesecake. Nothing about it was New York Style, but it was good - real good.

Three Sisters

Well, there's another hotel restaurant, by now you should know how I feel about the whole concept. When it comes to hotels in Tallinn, Three Sisters is considered to be one of the most exquisite and their restaurant wonderful by a lot of people.

Since the weather has been summer-like and they also have a courtyard, I managed to visit them twice in this past week. Once for lunch and then later in a week for dinner. I've always been little suspicious of their menu, mainly because of my dislike of pretentious cuisine and when you read their menu you could get a feeling that the chef insists on recherche ingredients not because of their qualities but their snob value.

First - lunch: I ordered a glass of Sangria Rose and a BLT and it was great. Sangria was nicely on the dry side and BLT almost the real thing. What got me thinking though was the simplicity of a sandwich offered in the hotel that likes to charge around $1000 for some of it's rooms. In any case I enjoyed the simple lunch with good company in a pleasant environment.

Now for the dinner visit - I have to admit that once again I kept good company, but the environment and some of the other components of having a great dinner out were lacking of ....something. They really try to be a first grade establishment, but even though the waiting staff was very quick and polite, almost ninja like, I found the way of sommelier's behavior to be too familiar for my taste. I need to point out that the head sommelier was not present that night and the guy helping us was all proud of becoming a certified sommelier just a week ago.

That doesn't change the fact that when looking for a perfect wine pairing he paid no attention to our personal preferences and then ended recommending a much more expensive choice than what I personally would have chosen.

Now the food - I started with a Waldorf Salad and it was just OK, everything was fresh and all the necessary ingredients were present on the plate, but for whatever reason they were really sliced and diced fine. Just too fine, almost shredded. Not the way it really should be.

I continued with PAN-FRIED DUCK FILLET WITH CARAMELIZED CHICORY with kumquat-ginger compote and green pepper-red wine sauce. I would call it endive instead of chicory, but I know that there's some serious confusion going on with naming this leafy vegetable that doesn't like daylight on some menus. Anyway it was good, I mean the caramelized endive. The duck was prepared to my liking when it comes to doneness, but it was little chewy. The sauce was a disappointment.

Then I got a bite from my companions plate, she had ordered SLOW ROASTED VEAL CHEEKS IN RED WINE SAUCE served with sweetbread, spinach and green beans. Man, that sweetbread just melted in my mouth. Not that many places serve heart thymus gland in these parts and this was a wonderful surprise. Definitely the high point of the experience.

All in all it was a pretty nice evening. Not great though, and considering what they think they are or try to be and what they cost I would expect little more.

Controvento

I think it's safe for me to say and most people will agree that Controvento is the most popular restaurant in the city of Tallinn. Why? I guess there are many reasons. The obvious one - the location, it does not get much better than that. St. Catherine's Passage smack in the middle of Old Town. Then again that pretty much only works with the tourists. For whatever reason most of the locals are not as fond of the picturesque medieval part of town.

Then again, locals have a even better reason to love this place. See, Controvento is one of the very few if not the only place that has managed to stay popular for the last decade and a half and because of that most people have their very own emotional attachment to it. Almost every one I know has some kind of tradition involving this homey restaurant located on the coziest street in town. For some it's a weekly Saturday afternoon thing, for others a New Year's Day tradition and guess what, no amount of clever advertising or marketing magic can top that. Something like that is embedded in the subconscious.

I have to say that I am an unfortunate one, for not having any deep emotional affection or feeling of loyalty towards this place and because of that I can remain absolutely objective. Here it goes - their pasta dishes stink and I don't mean that in a scent type of way. Their pizzas are just barely OK. See totally objective.

Don't worry it gets better from now on. First of all Controvento serves some of the best steaks in town and their fish is usually fresh and nicely prepared. Wine list adequate and not horribly over-priced. Unfortunately the vegetables that come as a side are just too plain and boring. All the plates are quite big and I guess because of that I've never had dessert here. Lets assume that their desserts are great.

All in all Controveto is a pleasant little restaurant with lovely atmosphere and a decent menu. I just personally love all the simple things of Italian cuisine. Food that doesn't cost much at the market, takes a long time to prepare and tastes wonderful because of that.

Controvento has been around for a while and will be around for a long time.

daVinci

Let's get the good out of the way first. Restaurant daVinci serves good Italian food in a setting that...qualifies... as nice, little sterile, but nice. Most of the food is good and some excellent. My personal favorites are Verdure alla Parmigiana for appetizers and Filetto Grigliato con Polenta su Salsa di Madeira for main dishes.

What makes daVinci special for me is their Gelato - best ice-cream in this city, no questions about it. Love the Frutti di Bosco and Pistacchio. Let's not forget that I am a person who remembers the street corners in Paris, Gordes and Lucca where he had the absolute best ice-cream in the world. I could still find these places today, maybe even blind-folded.
So take my word for it - you are not gonna find better ice-cream over here.

Another enjoyable thing about daVinci is their wine-list, a lot of good wines meant for drinking over lunch and a pretty good selection of fine wines for special occasions, with almost every region of the beautiful country of Italy represented. I don't like when restaurants fill their wine list with trophy wines and can't stand when they try to make a killing with their wine offering. daVinci doesn't do either.


Now here comes the catch. daVinci is divided in half - the cafe side on the left and the a la carte side on the right. Also daVinci is one of the few places in Tallinn that has a decent pizza oven... Are you ready - you can only get pizza on the cafe side. Did you get that? OK. But this is not even the funny part, their pizza oven is located in the a la carte side of the restaurant. So if you wanted a pizza, but were told that you can't have it, you can still get a whiff and a looksy when the waiter passes your table carrying it to the cafe side.

I'm sure somebody at some point figured this to be a logical solution. Maybe they think that they will not make enough money on something that cheap like pizza on their A LA CARTE side or maybe they think that when people sit down at a table that has a cloth on it, they forget that they love pizza. I don't know.

But imagine this - you are having a fun dinner out with friends, let's say a group of eight...wait for it - plus let's say people brought their kids with them. Five of them to be exact. You think that you are going to take a chance on a Carpaccio for a starter for 150EEK, follow it with a steak with truffle sauce for 280EEK and finish with a Tiramisu for 70EEK. 150+280+70=500. And you had a good day at work and decided to award your-self with a bottle of Amarone della Valpolicella 2001 for a whopping 1425EEK. And your friends are just as hungry and also had great days at the office.
Now 500+1425=1925x8=15400EEK. I'm sure you already know where I'm going with this - kids want pizza, and who's to blame them, everybody loves pizza. What do you do? Let me remind you ...NO PIZZA. What do you do? Do you ignore the kids request? Risk having to put up with five very unhappy youngsters, who are able to ruin your night out for much less that not getting pizza for dinner? Do you relocate to the cafe side? Or do you walk out the door?

I would use the door and I have personally seen other people walk out of daVinci for the same exact reason. Well hey, I'm sure whoever made such a radical reason as refusing pizza for their clients, is probably a Marketing Guru or a Customer Service Genius or both. He or she had reasons. Reasons good enough to make 15 400 EEK's walking out the door meaningless.

Baby Back

OMG, why is it, that everybody outside of US thinks that Americans eat ribs, burgers and nothing else? All this, when for example there's more Chinese restaurants in the States than McDonald's, Burger King and Wendy's restaurants combined.

Anyhow if you want to see and taste a comical stereo type of what the rest of the world thinks US looks like and what it eats - this place "Baby Back" is perfect. Unfortunately it doesn't come close to offering a sampling of American cuisine, not even of the stereotypical one.

The steaks are horribly over-cooked and over-priced, this pretty much goes for the rest of the food too. My personal funny favorite from the menu is Creole Gumbo. Boy, they must really know their stuff, since they actually make a distinction between Creole and Cajun Gumbos outside of Louisiana. But...it turns out they think Creole Gumbo is a spicy creamy soup. Yep, they put cream in Gumbo. Believe it.

I don't think I'm going to make a mistake of visiting them again. Not good food, not at all, but you don't have to take my word for it. Go ahead, I dare you.

Now here, this is the way to make Gumbo, yes it takes forever, specially if you make your own roux. I do. It's worth it. There's nothing like a great Gumbo.

http://www.gumbopages.com/food/gumbo.html

TOP 10 worst restaurants of Tallinn

In no particular order

Buenos Aires




Fellini

La Vie

Paat

Elevant

Bossanova Corallo

Lucca

African Kitchen

Mercado

Mack Bar-B-Que


Off course there's no really objective way of putting together a list like this, so
I tried to take into account what kind of places the restaurants on the list are trying to be. Obviously I don't think they've accomplished their goals.

As always I'm open for your suggestions, let us know your absolute worst dining experiences. Everybody likes crap like that.